The High Vibe Guide

40. Happiness Blockers#3 - Who do you Invite to your Inner Table?

Jenna Miller Season 1 Episode 40

In today's episode, we revisit my mini-series, 'Happiness Blockers'.  I think this is one of the biggest factors affecting our emotional happiness - who you spend your time with. I like to call it "Who You Invite to Your Inner Table." Not everyone deserves a seat, and the energy we surround ourselves with plays a major role in our overall well-being. 

We'll explore how to recognise the impact others have on you, why it's so important to choose your circle wisely, and how to handle it when distancing yourself from negative influences gets tricky - especially when it’s someone close. Tune in for practical tips on protecting your energy and maintaining emotional stability.

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the High Vibe Guide, the podcast where I demystify the concept of raising our vibration. I'm Jenna, a yoga teacher, mum of three and passionate advocate for helping others to just feel happier. Let me explain to you how we can all live more contented and fulfilled lives, and how it's so much easier than you think. Hello, hello, welcome back to the High Vibe Guide, you lovely lot. Hello, hello, welcome back to the High Vibe Guide, you lovely lot. Today's episode is the third in our mini series of happiness blockers, where I've been discussing some ways we unknowingly make it difficult for happiness to flow into our lives, and today's topic is all about who you choose to spend your time with, or, as I like to call it, who you invite to your inner table, because not everyone deserves a seat at your table, and this can truly make or break your energy and your happiness levels. So let's get into it and your happiness levels. So let's get into it Now. When I say who you invite to your inner table, I'm talking about the people you allow into your inner world, your energy space and your emotional space, so it's not going to be every single person that you spend time with More that it's the ones that you spend the most time with, or the ones you confide in, the ones you invest your time and energy with, or maybe it's simply the ones that you interact with on a regular basis. And let's understand something it's not always easy to recognise that some of these people might actually be blocking certain levels of happiness and affecting where you operate on that energetic scale. So why is this important? If you look at this from a scientific perspective, if you look at this from a scientific perspective which you guys now know I like to do as well as the spiritual I am that sceptic spiritualist I need both sides. So, from the scientific standpoint, we know that we are highly influenced by our environment, and a massive part of that is taken up by the people we spend time with, and studies have shown that emotions and attitudes are contagious.

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So if you're surrounded by people who are constantly negative, always complaining or living in a low vibration, their energy can seep into your own. You might even find yourself adopting their behaviours, their outlooks or their thought patterns without even realising it. And this doesn't just affect your mood. It can affect your stress levels, your physical health and even your decision making. See, our brains are wired to mirror the emotions of those around us. So if you're sitting across the table from someone who's constantly in a bad space, it's very likely you'll feel that shift in your own energy. Energy will always match the dominant energy in the room. And if you want to look at this from a spiritual standpoint, who you spend your time with directly impacts your vibration, what level you are operating on. Every interaction is an exchange of energy.

Speaker 1:

So if you're trying to raise your vibration, if you're trying to manifest better things in your life or simply just trying to live in a high frequency state, you need to be mindful of the energy you're allowing into your world. So when you surround yourself with positive, uplifting people, they naturally elevate you. But if you're around people who drain you or bring a more toxic energy, they can pull you down, making it difficult to maintain a higher state of being. So how do you recognise their impact? Again, it all comes down to awareness, as does most things in the first step, but start by paying attention to how you feel before, during and after spending time with certain people. Do you feel drained? Do you feel anxious or irritable after seeing them? Do you find yourself thinking negative thoughts that you wouldn't normally have. If the answer is yes, that's a sign that their energy is possibly affecting yours. And what do you do when you realise this might be someone that's close to you? This is where it gets tricky. So what happens when you realize that one of these people is someone really close to you? Maybe it's a family member or a close friend, or even your partner? Oof, I know this is tough, because you might feel obligated to keep them at your table, even if they're not good for your energy. But here is the truth you have to prioritise your own mental, emotional and spiritual health, and that means recognising the impact their energy is having on you. Hello you, it's Jenna, and I just want to take a quick moment to tell you about something I'm really passionate and excited about my new, amazing creation, soul Circle.

Speaker 1:

If you've been looking for a way to bring more balance, more peace and movement into your life, soul Circle is the online yoga studio and community designed just for you. Whether you're brand new to yoga or you've been practicing for years, soulcircle offers a space to grow at your own pace. We've got an on-demand library full of yoga classes, guided meditations, breathing techniques and more. You'll even find the extension of this podcast, the High Vibe Guide, the yoga edition, where you can learn all about how we can incorporate the teachings of yoga philosophy without us all living like monks, plus a supportive community of yogis from all over. It's like having your own personal yoga teacher and wellness studio right in your pocket, available whenever you need it. Are you ready to take the next step? Head over to wwwsoulcircleuk and start your free trial today.

Speaker 1:

And once you recognize this, it's time to take action. But do not worry, because it doesn't have to be all confrontational or filled with drama. So how do we create some distance without the drama? When it comes to distancing yourself from these people, you don't always need to have a huge confrontation. In fact, in some cases, I think it's better to avoid it altogether if you're trying to maintain the peace. So here's how you can do it.

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Firstly, it might just be as simple as gradually reducing contact. Just start by slowly reducing how much time you spend with them. It might be as simple as creating space, just bit by bit. Secondly, you might want to set some boundaries. So if this person is someone you can't completely distance yourself from, say like it's a family member, set clear emotional boundaries and to keep the peace, not causing drama. This might just mean not discussing certain topics with them that you know will lead to negativity. This is easier said than done. I know that you're going to have to be the one to make this energetic shift if you want to see change between the two of you. Thirdly, you can try redirecting the conversation. So if they start complaining or you feel them dragging the energy down, try redirecting the conversation to something more neutral or positive, and I want you to remember that you can become the dominant energy here. So let your energy be the driving force. Try being so incredibly positive that the collective energy has nowhere else to go but up. And lastly this one's quite important don't over explain. If you feel like you need to create distance, you don't actually owe anyone a detailed explanation, so you can try saying something like I've been really focusing on my own mental health lately, or maybe I'm just trying to be more mindful of how I spend my time.

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So what do you do if you really cannot remove this person from your life or even dial down the amount of time that you spend with them? Because sometimes removing someone just isn't possible. You know, maybe it's your boss, or it's a parent or someone that you see regularly that you have to interact with. So in these cases, what you need to do is safeguard your energy. That's the key. So here's how you can do that, and here's how I do it.

Speaker 1:

Firstly, you've got to think about some energetic protection, and one of my favorite ways to protect my energy is to visualize myself surrounded by this protective bubble of light before I interact with this person. And you visualize this as a barrier between you and their negative energy. Imagine it just bouncing off. Secondly, you need to be like oil on water. This is where you kind of need to oil yourself up emotionally. So when their negativity comes at you, imagine it just sliding right off like water off a duck's back. Don't engage with it and do not absorb it.

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Now, these visualization techniques are incredibly powerful and very effective, especially when you invest emotionally in them. Imagine how you are going to feel when you are using these visualization techniques and they're working. So take a few minutes to set up this visualization immediately before seeing the person, maybe even meditate with it for a few minutes, and then keep this visualization softly in your mind as you engage with them. This will be changing your own mindset and your own energy while you are engaging with them. And what you can also do afterwards is try a few grounding techniques. So, after you spend time with someone who you do feel is draining, you do a quick grounding practice, take a few deep breaths, visualize any negative energy just flowing out of you and ground back into your own positive space. Into your own positive space. I do have grounding meditations on my premium content here and I think I will create one for this kind of protective bubble, as I do practice this quite a lot and I have done from quite a young age.

Speaker 1:

But you just need to keep your table sacred. It's a sacred table. It's your round table. Choose who you want to be there. Who do you want to be at your inner table? Because you deserve to be surrounded by people who support and uplift you and encourage you to be the best version of yourself.

Speaker 1:

If you're finding it hard to let someone go, remember that prioritising your happiness and energy isn't selfish. And if you're finding it hard to let someone go, remember that prioritising your happiness and your energy isn't selfish. It's essential. If you are going to build a high vibe life, you need high vibe people around you. So start being a little more discerning about who you invite to sit with you and watch how your energy and your life begins to change. And watch how your energy and your life begins to change. And, on the flip side, let this be a reminder of the type of energy that you shine out into the world. Because, if you think about it, if people can have such a strong impact on you and your happiness, then how amazing would it be to shine your light into the world and spread some joy and happiness? Then how amazing would it be to shine your light into the world and spread some joy and happiness, even maybe to those people you don't always feel are deserving of it, because these are normally the people who need it most. So if someone else's energy can affect us so strongly, then imagine how your energy can affect other people's too. So I would strongly recommend thinking on this point.

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If you've realized that someone who cannot be removed from your life or or maybe this is someone who you really care deeply about and don't necessarily want to remove them you can't change that person's behaviour, but you can change, firstly, how you react to their behaviour. Secondly, how it makes you feel. Remember you are in charge of your emotions, no one else. And thirdly, how you then behave around that person. Remember, energy is contagious, so maybe you could make your positive energy the dominant energy in the room. See if you can be the guiding force, let all their negative energy roll right off your back and keep shining your light, and then just see how the dynamic between you starts to change, and then, potentially, their energy and their behaviour too.

Speaker 1:

So, my friends, that's all for today's episode of the high vibe guide. I hope this helps someone today and gives you a little clarity on why it's so important to be mindful of the company that you keep, as always. Take care of yourselves, keep looking for the good stuff, and I will see you next time. Thank you all so much for tuning in. If you enjoyed today's episode, please share with your friends and family to continue spreading that positivity. You can find me on Instagram at thehighvibeguide. Get in touch. I would love to hear from you. Thank you all so much for listening and I'll see you back here next time at the High Vibe Guide.